Captain's Log 2054 - Day 758
The food poisoning has passed through my system. I no longer have a longing to murder my crew and sacrifice them to a reptilian overlord. My new thing is startling people. I like to startle members of my crew. It's funny. I'm the prankster captain.
Captain's Log 2054 - Day 759
Sadly one of my crew died today. Carl, as they called him, had a heart attack right after I jumped from corner wearing a giant insect mask and shot him in the chest with a space laser. It was hilarious. Until Carl died. But then is was still a little bit funny.
Captain's Log 2054 - Day 760
My crew is blaming me for the death of Carl. Frankly, I don't see the connection. So I decided to pull a prank on my crew by "startling" them with imprisonment. When they told me it wasn't funny, I "startled" them by pressing the ejector button and casting them all off into the black void.
Captain's Log 2054 - Day 761
It is very difficult to manage a giant intergalactic space ship with only one man. Luckily I managed to steal the DNA of my crew and their clones are currently in vitro.
Captain's Log 2054 - Day 762
The clones hatched and it is not a pretty sight. They are demented mutants with extra limbs and a thirst for human blood that cannot be slaked.
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